existence precedes essence

Individual human reality consists of a person's past history which is combined with the progressive realization of future actions. But the past and the future are continuously being questioned by the nothingness of the present. I'm often accused of knowing too much... that I am the sort of person who can't enjoy anything in a simple way, whether its eating or drinking, or being intimate with others; I have to think about everything. People tell me that I'm too scientific and that I don't appeal to emotions. When I was in high school, I truly believed that I was a high functioning autistic because I had difficulty reading other people's emotions or expressing my own. But there are times when my actions get absorbed by passion and desire.

I don't really think that I over-analyze; I just feel that I have a lot of patience where most other people rush. So I take more time to question my actions. I can't relinquish the idea that the choices that I make determine the kind of person I am or will be.

"Man cannot be in a fixed and final manner: he has continuously to choose, to make decisions, to reaffirm old purposes and projects or to affirm new ones. He is continuously engaged in the work of self-construction, a task which is never completed but only ended by his death." -Maurice Cranston

It might be rare but I value the development of my moral character.